7 Step Guide to Raping, Pillaging and Butchering Your Mother

It’s easier than you think

Can you think of any better way to accomplish this than by following this simple little list?  If you implement and all follow this list there is no telling how fast you may accomplish this goal. 

1. Keep relying on fossil fuels

Heck, go out and buy a vehicle that gets about 10-12 MPG, this will help purge the world oil reserves that much quicker.  I wonder if you can buy an Indy car or Stock car and make it road legal.  Wait, for the same amount of money, why not buy about 5,000 weed eaters?  Those definitely do more damage to the air than any vehicle.

Sure fossil fuels are going to run out, but probably not until you and I are already dead.  It seems this is something that our kids and grandkids should have to worry about.

2. Waste Water

Keep the tap running when you are brushing your teeth.  That way you’ll waste about 5 gallons of water per day.  Throughout the whole U.S. that adds up to more water than is consumed in New York every day.

Half of all water used in the U.S. is used to raise animals for food.

A totally vegetarian diet requires 300 gallons of water per day, while a meat-eating diet requires more than 4,000 gallons of water per day. Time magazine reports, “Around the world, as more water is diverted to raising [cattle], pigs, and chickens, instead of producing crops for direct consumption, millions of wells are going dry.”

And, let’s not forget, if you live in a Desert, make sure to have grass brought in for a lawn.  Water that sucker every day, it’s going to need it.  Now you can really waste some water.

3. Stop Recycling

By not recycling you can put an additional 1,206 lbs. per person of garbage into American landfills every year.  Even if you multiply that number (1206 pounds) by the number of people in America (300 Million or so) it still weighs a whole lot less than the entire planet Earth.  It probably doesn’t even amount to a small pimple on your butt.

4. Eat As Many Animals As You Possibly Can

This will insure several things, among them that we keep people who are starving on this planet starving.  Why would we want to use the grain that is used to feed animals to feed hungry people?  Worldwide, livestock production occupies 70% of all land used for agriculture, or 30% of the ice-free land surface of the Earth.

According to Wikipedia.org Scientists attribute more than 18% of anthropogenic greenhouse gas emissions to livestock and livestock-related activities such as deforestation and increasingly fuel-intensive farming practices.

· 35-40% of global methane emissions (chiefly due to enteric fermentation and manure)

That’s a lot of Doo Doo!

· 64% of global nitrous oxide emissions, chiefly as a result of fertilizer use.

· 80% of U.S. agricultural land is used to raise chickens, pigs, and other farmed animals; 70% of grains are used to feed them. If the massive quantities of rain, soy, and corn now fed to factory-farmed animals were freed up, there would be plenty of food for the world’s starving people.

5. Use a Ton of Dependable Disposables

Keep using as many disposables as possible.  A good start would be Styrofoam cups, plastic utensils, paper plates and water bottles.

Our landfills (U.S.A.) are so enormous, does it really matter that we could save 244 Billion (yep, that’s Billion with a B) bottles and cups made from Petrochemical-based plastics from entering our waste system per year?

 If they get full, we can just start putting garbage somewhere else, it’s not a big deal.

6. Stay Uninformed

Ignorance is Bliss!  If we start learning about all of the benefits of conservation, reduction, recycling, shared responsibility and planet welfare, we could possibly end up feeling like we have to actually do something about it.  That doesn’t sound like fun.

7. Build a Really, Really Big As* House

You need room to spread out, even if it is just you and your partner.  The only reason more people don’t have big houses is because they can’t afford it, right?

It’s your money; you should have the right to spend it on more wood, carpet, tile, shingles, insulation, paint, metal, steel and windows.  So what if 2-3 times more resources are used in the building process alone, it will for sure look like a really sweet crib.

Who cares if the energy consumption of your 12,000 sq ft. house is 3-4 times more than the average American household?  You pay for it, right?

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